Denise's Adventures: KIPP: My future

Saturday, August 23, 2008

KIPP: My future

I know... I know... I have not blogged; I have not called; and there is no excuse for my behavior. Never mind that I have been sleeping on an air mattress for two weeks. Never mind that I had an extreme cold during my first week teaching with students; Never mind that my knee has given out, and I can barely walk. Never mind any of that.

The one thing that is keeping me together right now: School. I'll be honest, I would have never admitted this to any of you personally, but the thought of, "WHAT DID I DO!" has run through my head. I am happy with my decision. I just need to get out of my own way. I need to rest. I need to make a home. Before I make any judgements, I owe myself this.

I do miss everyone with everything I have, but I carry you with me always. Even as I sit in a Panera using the free Wifii (I have not yet received my Internet services because I am never home to receive the package!!!!!!!), I think of Noemi who introduced me to Panera when we drove to Illinois for her first year of residency. I fell in love with the Poppy seed dressing then, and now that I have been using the Internet here for about 4 hours, I'm thinking of ordering a poppy seed salad to go! As school started, I walked into a school of welcoming individuals, who I will say have been the most helpful and so giving. I do miss my Brownsville gang on Friday/Saturday nights when I want to go to a movie or play cards or just chill at Manda/Ana's home. And I miss my family.

AND MOST OF ALL MY LITTLE LADEE!!!!!!

Soon, I will begin to nest and begin to reveal all of the intricate stories that are unraveling for me. I have included some pictures so that you may see a bit of what my new school looks like. I almost cried when I saw the nameplate on my door!!! Isn't that cool! (But honestly, do they have to broadcast my road map of college successes and failures!) I love you all, and I will update this soon. I promise.

By the way my pictures are fuzzy because my camera is ___________!

2 comments:

Stephen said...: Well, isn't that a fancy, schmancy sign on your door for the whole world to see!!! Great to hear you're finally settling in a little. We all miss you very much!!!; 2:03 PM
Amanda said...: I like the direction your blog is taking! Less formal, more Denise.. Here! Here! I got a chance to talk to you for like 5 seconds tonight and that was nice. We miss you...and your little dog too!! LOVE the name plate. You seem so...official. I love a woman with power...; 10:34 PM

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My inspiration...

The book, The Alchemist changed my life and why I have made the changes and taken the risks I have in the past years. I want you to hear just a little piece of the introduction from the author, Paulo Coehlo, himself:

Oscar Wilde said: “Each man kills the thing he loves.” And it’s true. The mere possibility of getting what we want fills the soul of the ordinary person with guilt. We look around at all those who have failed to get what they want and feel that we do not deserve to get what we want either. We forget about all the obstacles we overcame, all the suffering we endured, all the things we had to give up in order to get this far. I have known a lot of people who, when their personal calling was within their grasp, went on to commit a series of stupid mistakes and never reached their goal—when it was only a step away.

This is the most dangerous of obstacles because it has a kind of saintly aura about it: renouncing joy and conquest. But if you believe yourself worthy of the thing you fought so hard to get, then you become an instrument of God, you help the Soul of the World, and you understand why you are here.